objects in the rearview mirror and things too close to see

Monday, March 31, 2003

Being Single

Alright, so I've read a pile of literature on the issue of being single and being a Christian single, and some important stuff to remember. If you're REALLY into that in any way, you could check this out, have a read and let me know what you think.


Christian Singleness
Today’s society often views singleness as a defect. Even church social events are almost always completely family-oriented, with little room for those not in the same stage of life. Parents will talk about the events going on in their own family life, and that can often be the extent of the conversation. Singles do not have the same daily experiences that married couples have, and therefore often feel out of place at church social events. Repeated occurrence of this can even lead to a lack of desire to attend church functions.
The Christian single must realize that this period of their life has been given to them by God, and can be filled with bringing glory to his name in a manner different than that of the family. God does not expect each and every person to get married, but He does place a time of singleness in most lives. Instead of filling that time with a longing for marriage, the time could be more beneficially spent serving God via such things as mission trips.
Being single should not be equated with discontentment. To be content as a single is to be content in the situation that God has placed us. In Philippians 4:11-13, Paul instructs the Christian to be content in all things, whatever the circumstances God has placed us in. In all things one must realize that true strength comes from Christ. The belief that marriage will bring contentment is a misconception. If a person is not content being single, marriage will not change that. They will continue to be discontented through their life until they become content with the situation that God has chosen to place them in.
The concept of marriage must be kept in perspective. The notion that completeness is found in marriage and not in singleness is a misconception. The only true completeness to be found in this life is in Jesus Christ. The apostle Paul believed that it would be beneficial for all people to be single, so that they could bring glory to God in a manner different than marriage. Without a family to care for, a single individual can do the Lord’s will without distraction. The point is that singleness is not a lower position than that of marriage.
Singleness is a gift that God has bestowed upon individuals. It should be viewed as an opportunity to please God. If a person spends the entire time that they are single simply longing not to be single, they are throwing away the opportunity that God has given them, and thereby disobeying God’s command to give glory to Him in all that we do. Contrary to popular belief, complaining is not a right, but rather a sin.
It is true that being single is not always easy. Seeing friends get married and start families at a time when the single is nowhere near that stage can bring on jealousy. Christian singles cannot allow their feelings to cause them to stray from God’s will. The Bible has set guidelines for how to live life as a single - the Bible is not directed only to those who are married or working towards that end. Accepting Biblical guidelines for singleness does not mean that one must permanently remain single. Singleness can be merely a stage of life for some, while others may choose to be single their entire lives.
In marriage, God blesses couples with children. Isaiah speaks of blessings greater than children that are available to the single person. In Isaiah chapter 56:4-7, the Lord promises that the single people who “hold fast My covenant” will be given a place and a name “better than that of sons and daughters.” God promises eternity in His presence to “everyone who keeps from defiling the Sabbath and holds fast My covenant.” This God, who “gathers the outcasts of Israel” and whose house is called “a house of prayer for all nations.” God does not limit his covenant to those who are married. He includes those people who have no one to claim as family then Christ. The family of God includes people of all types.
To be a Christian single often takes much strength. One must be patient, trusting in the Lord to bring about His plans in due time. Complaining about the situation that one has been put in is sinful, and will most definitely not better the situation in any way. The Christian must constantly remember that God alone is the source of aid, and therefore the One in who trust must be placed. This season of singleness has been given by God to help the Christian develop in various ways, and being content with where God has placed one is essential if this development is to occur. The Christian single must remember above all that their chief end is to give glory to God in all that they do, and that the ways in which this can be done while an adult Christian single are much different than at any other stage of life.


So that's that. Today I spent all day working on some major English independent study that I have to do for my Studies in Lit. class. Interesting. I'm working now on figuring out Shakespeare's worldview from Henry V. It's a good story, and it has some great political aspects to it.

So that's my speel for the night, have a goodnight.

- tk

- Don't know if you caught it, but I put up a few more poems on the site.
~ "Too Far Gone" by the All American Rejects <- great tune, I highly reccommend. I've been listening to it all day. Along with various other selected tunes ;)

Monday, March 24, 2003

A Song and A Thought

(not by me)


6am day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in the dark
The smell of cold
Car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping
I am numb

Up the stairs to the apartment
She is balled up on the couch
Her mom and dad went down to Charlotte
They're not home to find us out
And we drive
Now that I have found someone
I'm feeling more alone
Than I ever have before

She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly
Off the coast and I'm headed nowhere
She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly

They call her name at 7:30
I pace around the parking lot
Then I walk down to buy her flowers
And sell some gifts that I got
Can't you see
It's not me you're dying for
Now she's feeling more alone
Than she ever has before

She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly
Off the coast and I'm headed nowhere
She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly

As weeks went by
It showed that she was not fine
They told me son, it's time to tell the truth
She broke down, and I broke down
Cause I was tired of lying

Driving home to her apartment
For a moment we're alone
Yeah she's alone
I'm alone
Now I know it

She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly
Off the coast and I'm headed nowhere
She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly


Yeah, I'm sorry that I haven't been writing in so long, my life has just been terribly unexciting lately.

So yesterday I talked to a good friend about love interests. It was a good conversation, probably not as long as I would've liked, but something of value, regardless. Funny how a few words from someone that you respect and whose opinion you value can affect your outlook. I value those talks.

- Brent

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